Day 6

Another good day!

Josh and Millie left to go back home today. They will probably just be there for a couple days but it is hard for me to have them gone. I sure miss them. I spent the morning bathing kids and getting Millie ready to go.

I headed to the hospital around 1:00. I had to pump and then headed to see my little baby Brig. As soon as I got there the nurse asked if I wanted to hold him. His bilirubin had gone down quite a bit so he didn't have to be under the lights anymore. I held him for 3 hours and I loved every second of it! He was sound asleep the whole time but it was still nice to hold him. I would have held him all night long but I had to pump again and he needed his diaper changed.

While I was pumping he started to get upset so the nurse changed his diaper. Once I was done it was time for Brigham to eat. It was so cute. He was wide awake and looking around. My little brother Nate stopped to see him for a little while. Its kinda fun for me to show off how cute Brig is.

I am feeling really hopeful that we are almost ready to come home. I know we are on the down hill side of things and that makes me SO happy.

Once I got home from the hospital I got to take Levi and Callie to a school carnival across the street from my moms house. Its nice to do things that seem normal. Part of me feels like I should never leave the hospital but I also know my other kids need me as much as Brigham does.

Thanks for all the prayers and support!

Day 5

Sorry for the lack of updates. Blogger has been down for a day or so. Its been kind of annoying because it seems like I start to forget what happens.

Day 5 was a good day for us. Josh and I were kind of lazy at my moms house all morning. Life flight day was just SO exhausting!

We got to the hospital around 1:30 or so. My sister's friend Jada was our nurse and she was really nice. The nurse practitioner was also really helpful and explained things really well. When we first got there they took his blindfold off and he was wide awake for a while just looking at us. It made me really happy to see him with his eyes open. After a little while I went to pump and Josh went to do a little shopping. As I was finishing up pumping the nurse came and told me they were ready to take him off the vent. She waited for me to get there and I watched them pull the tube out of him and put him on the nCPAP. He handled it really really well. He was so calm and mellow and he didn't even have morphine in him to force him to be calm.

I just have really so calm since then. I feel like we are really making progress now!!! YAY!

Brigham Update: Day 4

I wish I was a better blogger. My horrible blogging skills along with my brain filled with mush is going to make this hard to understand.

On Tuesday night (day 3) we noticed that Brigham was still breathing really fast. He was on high flow oxygen and it really didn't seem to be helping him. The nurse we had was really great and called the dr. Eventually the dr. decided to put him on nasal cpap. This just ticked Brig off and he would not calm down. Around midnight Josh and I went to bed. The nurse had given him some morphine so eventually he didn't have a choice but to calm down.

Wednesday morning I got up to pump around 5:30 and couldn't get back to sleep so I went down to the NICU. Even on the nasal cpap it seemed like he was still having a hard time slowing down his breathing. He was retracting quite a bit and I just felt like it might be time to transfer him to a different hospital. I asked the nurse about it and she seemed like he would be fine in Logan because he wasn't getting any worse. The fact that he wasn't getting any better was really bothering me. The dr came in that morning and it was decided that we should transfer. Normally they would have sent him to McKayDee in Ogden but we decided to come to UVRMC since its closer to my parents house and to where the kids are.

Things started happening really fast after this. Josh came up to the room where staying to fill me in on what was going on. I of course lose it.....just in time for the social worker to show up. She was really nice and had been calling our insurance company and UVRMC to make sure things were all going to work out that way. Pretty soon after that the pediatrician and the family dr. showed up to kind of let us know how things were going. They told us life flight had been called and it would probably be a couple hours before the showed up. It didn't take that long though and pretty soon the NICU nurse called to tell us they were on their way.

Once they got there they went right to work getting Brig switched over to their vent. Josh and I were able to stay right close to him until the helicopter took off. Josh was able to video the whole thing so that might be fun to watch sometime.

We got down to the hospital around 3:30 or 4. Its really different that the NICU in Logan. After being there for a while with a lame nurse we finally found someone who could answer all of our questions. Right before we left we were able to talk to the neonatologist. He was really nice and helpful.

The reason Brig hasn't been getting better is because he has an infection. It seems like his body is working so hard to fight the infection that his lungs just can't get better. He has pneumonia and the were concerned that he might have spinal meningitis. The dr called me late last night to tell me the lumbar puncture had gone well and that he does NOT have spinal meningitis. (YAY) The other good news is that his bilirubin had gone down quite a bit. Yesterday morning it was at 17 and when the tested him at UVRMC is was down to 11. I think today he might be able to go without the bili lights and then we can take his blindfold off. I miss seeing his cute eyes.

As for the rest of us: We are doing good. It was so great to see the kids yesterday. I was pretty emotional and missing them so much. Of course they have just been having a great time playing with grandma and grandpa. I am sure I needed them more than they needed me. Josh has been amazing through this. He keeps me calm and helps me understand things. He is really great at asking questions. Really he needs husband and dad of the year award because without him I am pretty sure they would be doping me up with morphine too.

It looks like we are going to be here for a while longer. My guess is that we will be here into next week sometime. Josh is able to miss work. Its been nice to have his coworker and principal tell him that will just take care of things there for him. I really have needed him with me. We have had MANY people offer to help us with the kids. Right now I feel like we need to be together as a family so the kids are going to stay down here with us. I am not concerned at all about them missing school. As for what you can do for us.... just keep praying. If I think of anything else I promise I'll ask but for now there just really isn't much that can be done. I really appreciate all of the phone calls, text messages and facebook messages. They have really cheered me up and made me feel loved. If I don't respond please dont be offended. Things have been really busy so sometimes I just don't get around to responding and then I forget. It also gets kind of hard to tell the story over and over again.

We really appreciate the thoughts and prayers and love. I know there have been some fasts organized too and we really appreciate it. I will try and update this every day with all the details that I can give. Please check back and share the blog address with people that ask about us.

Thanks again for all of the support!

(and please forgive the typos)

This was this morning, May 10. Its kind of blue because of the bilirubin lights. Poor little man. He doesn't love that mask......well really he doesn't like any of it.
This is shortly after his born. Before we even had any idea that his little lungs so premature. Poor little baby Brigham. :(

Time to blog again

Hey! I haven't blogged for a very long time. Mostly because we are pretty boring (and busy) people. There hasn't been much to talk about but now that Brigham is here and having some issues I decided its going to be easier to update people this way. Its hard to remember what I have told people and who I have told so I just decided that blogging will help a bit.

For now he is making progress. He was taken off the ventilator this morning. I am so happy about that!!! He is getting help to breath with high flow oxygen. I feel like he is still breathing a little too fast but the nurses and dr haven't seemed too worried. His bilirubin level is still high (15) so he has lights above him and below him. He is on a feeding tube that is inserted through his nose. I've been pumping breast milk since shortly after he was born and I'm glad he is able to get nutrients from that. He also is on an IV. There is one in each hand but they only use one hand at a time and just kind of switch back and forth. He gets an antibiotic, morphine, and some calories through the IV.

When I get time I'll go back over the last 3 or 4 days. I think it will be good to journal it all a little because my brain has pretty much turned to mush in the last couple days.

Swimming Lessons

My kids really hated swimming lessons. Its was a good experience for them but man they thought it was pure torture!
Yeah, I got to be a mean mommy and drop them off the diving board.

I was sooooo glad she loosened her grip on my enough to not pull me in after her.

Millie kind of pretended to like it as long as she was sitting right on the edge of the pool.

No pretending for Levi. He cried. A LOT!

SUMMER TIME!!!!

I guess I just have better things to do than blog.....
Like take pictures of Callie while she is super mess and posing all cute in her daddy's hat.

Or spy on my kids while they are feeding stolen carrots to the neighbor's horses. I wondered where all my carrots went. Spoiled horses!